Why It Took Me a Year to Start HRT

I’m 40, a mom of three, married, active, and someone who has always taken care of herself.

And a few years ago… something shifted.

Just enough to make me feel like I wasn’t fully myself.

 

It didn’t start with “brain fog”

At 38, I went to my doctor for my annual appointment and mentioned exhaustion and feeling different — more overwhelmed and more tired than I had ever felt before.

I didn’t have the language for it yet.
I didn’t walk in saying “I have brain fog” or “I think this is perimenopause.”

I just knew something wasn’t right.

I couldn’t think as clearly as I used to.
I felt overwhelmed and not as sharp as I had been.
I couldn’t focus the way I used to.

And the fatigue?

It was next level.

Not “I need a nap” tired.

I couldn’t make it through my day the way I used to.
By the end of the day, I felt completely drained.

And that part really got to me.

Because I knew this wasn’t me.

 

The appointment that surprised me

My doctor listened, ran bloodwork, and came back with something I wasn’t expecting:

She recommended HRT.

At 38.

I remember sitting there thinking…

Wait… what?

In my mind, HRT was something women in their 50s took.
Something for menopause.
Something far away from where I was.

Not something for me.
Not at 38.
Not for “just feeling off.”

 

So I didn’t take it

Even though I trusted her.
Even though she explained it would help.

I had the prescription… and I didn’t fill it.

Not because I didn’t believe her —
but because I didn’t understand it enough to say yes.

And I think that matters.

 

What that year looked like

I did some research and decided I would see if diet and exercise could help my levels first.

So, I kept going.

Eating well.
Staying active.
Trying to push through.

But nothing changed.

It actually got worse.

The fatigue felt heavier.
The mental fog felt thicker.
And that feeling of being slightly disconnected from myself never really left.

 

The moment things shifted

A year later, I went back for my annual appointment.

Same conversation.
Same symptoms.

But this time… worse.

My doctor asked if I had started the HRT.

I told her I hadn’t.

So we ran bloodwork again.

And this time, my levels were even lower.

 

That was the moment for me

Not fear.
Not pressure.
Just clarity.

Because now I could see it.

It wasn’t just a feeling.
It wasn’t just stress.
It wasn’t something I needed to push through.

There was something actually going on in my body.

And I finally felt ready to do something about it.

 

What I want other women to hear

If you’re reading this and thinking:

“I feel off, but I can’t explain it…”
“I’m tired, but this feels different…”
“I don’t feel like myself anymore…”

I get it.

I was there.

You don’t have to rush into anything.
You’re allowed to take time to understand your options.

But you also don’t have to stay stuck in something that doesn’t feel right.

 

Why I’m sharing this now

Because I feel different today.

Clearer.
Stronger.
More like myself again.

And I wish I had understood sooner what was actually going on.

Not so I could rush the decision…

But so I could make it from a place of understanding, not hesitation.

 

If I could say one thing to you

You’re not just tired.
You’re not just stressed.
And you’re not imagining it.

There might be more going on than you think.

And figuring that out?

That’s not overreacting.

That’s you paying attention to yourself.

 

🤍 If you’re in this season — questioning, learning, trying to figure out what’s going on — you’re not alone.

 

-Rachel

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